My Coping Skills Have Got Up and Left!
It’s been a dreadful ten days or so…my days have all merged into one very long chain of “just when I thought it could not get any worse”.
To start the dominoe effect, my grandmother, “Charlotte the Great”, lost her older sister. It’s not so much I was close to “Aunt Pat”. I remember her. I remember picking strawberries with her and she was an incredible cook. Her health had been deteriorating over the past seven years since she had a stroke–and she was 88—it was expected.
But to see “Charlotte the Great” grieve. To hear her remember fond moments. To also hear my mother speak of “Aunt Pat”…it was a sad time for my heart.
Tuesday my cousin called to tell me my paternal Grandfather was admitted to the hospital with fluid in his lungs (not pneumonia) and congestive heart failure.
I spent a lot of time at my grandpa’s playing with my cousin as a child. My grandpa is one of the most witty and humorous people I’ve ever encountered. He’s had an amazing life, filled with adventure and more tragedy than he deserved. He’s 91. It’s been a long, full life.
My mind is bogged down with the cogs of death. I understand it is inevitable. The people I love who have passed or are nearing this point in their life have lived. I’m selfish. I want more time with them. It’s the flooding of memories that haunt me and leave me lethargic with grief.
As if this wasn’t enough for one person, I’ve now received numerous DMs and messages on twitter than my twitter account was hacked! Seriously? If you were my hacker’s target, I apologize. I think I have it resolved.
I’m asking you to bear with me. I’m behind in email. I’m behind in posting. I value each of you and promise as soon as my coping skills come back from vacation, I’ll be good as new!